1. Connect the leash to the dog's hind quarters. You and the dog both walk backwards.
2. When the dog leaves a "gift" in someone's yard, jump up and down in delight exclaiming "Alright! We now have dinner! We can go home now!"
3. As you approach each mailbox or light pole, circle them singing "Ring around the Rosie, Pocket full of Posies."
4. As you approach other walkers, ask them if they would like to pet your cat.
5. Tip toe carefully as you walk and yell at the dog when he steps on a crack.
6. Sniff everything the dog sniffs.
7. Rather than walking on the sidewalk, walk with one foot on the street and the other on the curb singing "Hi Ho, Hi Ho, It's off to work we go".
8. Stop in each driveway, look confused, and ask the dog "Is this one our house?"
9. Put the collar around your neck, connect the leash, and chase your dog down the sidewalk yelling "Hold on to this, will ya!"
10. Whenever the dog stops to smell something, ask him in your Dr. Frankenstein voice "Something for the laboratory, Fido?"
11. Move your head as though you are following invisible flies and swat at them while you walk.
12. Hang your tongue out and pant whenever you get tired.
13. Freeze perfectly still when other walkers pass you.
14. Walk with your shoestrings tied together and yell at the dog as if he was the one that did it.
15. Drive to another neighborhood, get out of the car with your dog, and walk back and forth in front of just one house for about 20 minutes.
16. Try to train your dog to stop and go by yelling "Red Light! Green Light!"
18. When passing other dog walkers, remark to the owners that their dogs sure look tender.
19. Bring a second leash connected to an empty collar. Drag it behind you. Smile and nod to passersby, as if nothing is wrong.
20. Place snacks in your pooper scooper and eat them while following the dog.